Wednesday, July 18, 2007
NUMB
is what I feel right now. As I have been told over and over...I knew before we had kids that I would have to work and they would have to be in daycare. My response to that...no one told me before I had kids how much I would absolutely love my little boy making the thought of someone else raising him all day while I raise other people's children so paralyzing to me. This pain has been in my heart since the day he was born, but now with Back to School rapidly approaching and Jack's personality starting to bloom it has consumed me. I have tried to think of any way in which it would work so that I could stay home just a year with him or part time with him...but with every great idea (lottery, night jobs, selling my soul)...there are about 5 drawbacks (insurance, daycare if I worked part time, draining our savings, etc.). Every time I think I have cried out all my tears...more come. This sucks!!!!!
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Thanks a lot for making me cry! I am feeling the same pain as you and Nola is only two weeks old. I don't know if it will help but someone told me that babies will not remember who watched them for the beginning years. I thought about it and what I remember growing up is doing homework with my mom after school. My earliest memories were from about Kindergarten/1st grade. For some reason this makes it a little easier, right now. I may need you to remind me on Jan 1st.
HANG IN THERE!!!
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